Listeroo
- Next week I start school and will no longer be able to make it to Project Runway Wednesday. BOO!
- The last two guys I dated had the same name and both drove Jeeps. Weird.
- I just started embroidering and I’m hooked! My first two projects were Sublime Stitching patterns…lungs (which I’d photograph if I weren’t so lazy) and roses.
- My next embroidery project will be this sampler. I’m thinking pillow. My sister is going to love it.
- Today my niece said, “Don’t. Talking. YOU.” I’m not sure how I feel about that.
- Twenty-four hours doesn’t seem like enough and I’m not even in school yet. I am so screwed.
- My uncle and aunt visited from the bay area on Sunday night. We weren’t able to spend very much time together and seeing them made me feel extremely homesick.
- I had a bad dream last night about an old coworker. Pretty sure it was my subconscious punishing me for saying she dressed her kids like baby hookers. But she totally did!
- I’m afraid to touch myself. Perhaps I should take a cue from the search phrases that land people here? Such as: masturbating with pillow or she masturbated so quietly that no one could hear?
- Did you know that the Ford Taurus is a luxury vehicle? Neither did I. Because it isn’t.
Categories:Uncategorized, crafty
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I’ve been wanting to embroider. I love the sublime patterns!
You should give embroidery a try! Sublime patterns are super adorable. I’ve also found quite a few free printable vintage patterns and a super awesome embroidery book from the 60s at the thrift store for two dollars. SCORE!
You’ve burst my bubble with this Ford Taurus revelation.
I was big into embroidery for a while when I was very young. Maybe I should take it back up, and finally finish that baby blanket I started when I was 10. Although, at this point, it certainly wouldn’t be for my OWN baby, as initially planned 35 years ago. Hee.
I tried embroidery when I was a kid, but I never finished anything. I think if I started now, the only thing that would happen is that my cats would think it was the most awesome toy ever.
And those are some strange Google hits you have going on there…
Well, I must say this is the first time I have read a post with both embroidery AND masturbation…
Just when I was thinking “oh, this is a craft blog”, bam! There’s the masturbation.
C’mon! Who doesn’t love some good ol’ masturbation???
One of my first vehicles was a Ford Taurus and let me tell you what, I thought that thing was pure pimp! It had automatic windows and that was the shit back in the day.
I love the random lists.
I think you should embroider a zombie throw pillow. Just use that picture of you in the zombie walk as a pattern.
Touching yourself gets easier with practice.
I totally understand about not enough hours in the day, and yet I waste SO many of them. How long does it take to become a member of Club Celibacy? ‘Cause despite the fact I’m married, I think I’m getting close to qualifying. And anything with needles scares me a little, it’s an act of sheer will to sew on a button.
I love those Sublime kits. I made a tatto themed towel last year using their stuff. Yours looks awesome!
The Ford Taurus is so far from being a luxury vehicle. Who are they trying to fool?
The Grunt,
Uh oh, have you been hanging out with my mother?
lizgwiz,
I did a lot of counted cross stitch when I was a kid…I like this better though because I don’t have to count/pay too much attention!
Noelle,
My cat thinks everything is a toy, including jewelry, pacifiers and chapstick. So I’ve been hiding my work from his curious little (er, large) ass.
Lisa,
Oh yeah, I’m totally flexible. One day this is a cat blog, the next day it’s an embroidery and masturbation blog. Which by the way, totally needs to be added to my header.
apollocreed,
You know who doesn’t? THE MORMONS! Five minutes on the highway in Utah and you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.
drop dead chris,
Auto windows? I didn’t have those until my third (current) car!
Sra,
I’m all about the random lists.
That’s an excellent idea! I wandered across a post recently about how to turn a photo into an embroidery transfer. BRAINS!
J.,
I think how long it takes to get into Club Celibacy is different for everyone…you’re welcome whenever you’re ready!
tori,
Thanks! It’s pretty hard to go wrong with Sublime Stitching!
Burreetoe,
MY MOTHER!
Lungs?
Yup, LUNGS! They’re part of the Sublime Stitching Vital Organs pattern kit.
http://www.sublimestitching.com/vitalorgans.html
At least for the baby whores you can get them BRATZ! dolls for gifts.
And I’m not sure that you remember or realize what kind of car I drive. Yes, a FORD TAURUS! You’re just jealous of my luxurious lifestyle.
I used to embroider, it’s very relaxing. Must think of taking it up again.
I dated a guy after my divorce who had the same exact birthdate as my ex. Once I found that out, he was gone. I just couldn’t go there.
Who called the Taurus a luxury vehicle? Because that person needs to be put out of their misery.
I’ve been wanting to try some of the Sublime patterns but am too lazy to get my ass in gear. Are they easy-ish?
Meh, Project Runway isn’t the dope it usually is lately. Catching it later isn’t the end of the world.
You know, we usually start PR pretty late – thank god for TIVO. You can still come after school – we’ll wait.
What do you think of the gay Mormon on Project Runway? He started out as kind of a tool, but now he’s showing some promise. My gays are even starting to like him.
btw, I shut down old blog, and started a new one.
Sorry, new on is: amyeliz@wordpress.com
xoxo
I’ve never gotten into embroidery probably because cross-stitching is my mom’s craft and I’d rather pick my own crafts, thank you. If anyone could make me try it, though, the Sublime Stitching folks could. Why can’t I find any of the naughty ones on that site, though? Don’t they sell “Home sweet fucking home” anymore?
Also, per #2, I once had two dates in the same week with two guys named Mike who both rode motorcycles and enjoyed martial arts and were IT managers by trade. Spooky indeed.