Me: Know what’s awesome? Smoking on my way to the gym. Gross.
Zanny: Oh wow! I may have to kick your butt.
Me: Afraid I may need it.
Zanny: Smoking all the time?
Me: Close.
Zanny: Got it. We need an intervention?
Me: Probably.
Me: That’s yes in denial-ese.
Zanny: OK. Expect a large Italian man with a baseball bat.
Me: How big is his penis?
Zanny: As big as the bat. He tucks it into his sock.
Me: OMG. I can’t wait!
Zanny: I figured that he could keep your mind off smoking.
Me: True dat.
Zanny: You thought I was going to have him cap your ass. Instead he’s going to spank it.
A beefy Italian man with a huge schlong is going to come over and spank you and this is punishment?
hahaha… um sadly, I am guilty of always crankin’ a butt before I go to the gym. Everytime i do it, i tell myself how big of a retard i am.
It’s kind of a good thing that bit by bit they’re making it impossible to smoke in Utah, huh? I was glad of it. Haven’t smoked since January.
Seriously, that was the funniest text convo I have had in a long time. Considering I was on the couch, watching a Lifetime movie and trying to get over Strep (yes, in June), it made my entire day.
BTW – did he ever show up?
Maybe I should take up smoking…
I could take you to a place that would make you want to never smoke another cigarette in your life. I hope the cravings ease up on ya:)
Wow, I sounded incredibly self righteous in my comment to you. I hope you know that it was coming from a friendly place.
I’m thinking that would distract you from the smoking, right? At least for a little while?
Well, you may smoke but at least you go to the gym so you’re one up on me…or maybe we’re even..hm. Never mind and good luck with the gym!
Wow… that’s funny, cuz I’m trying to give up my addiction to sex with hung Italian men by replacing it with smoking.
I always have a smoke before I hit they gym.
I’ll be in the Sandy/Draper are next week. Let’s get together and smoke. Did I tell you that my gay boyfriend is going to bee meeting me in Utah?
You are hilarious!