Pants, pants, PANTS!

Build your own short fiction story using the opening line provided by my favorite Three Letter Acronym Man, please check out Purgatorian for details.

Of course, hindsight is 20/20, but in reflection not having any time to waste I skipped washing my hands after using the urinal. I was having drinks in the hotel bar with my new associates on my first business trip. We were talking to two of the hottest, big breasted women I’d ever laid eyes on. I didn’t want to miss out on anything so I quickly took a piss and rushed back out to the bar.

I should have known something was wrong by the way everyone was laughing. My jokes weren’t that funny. After a couple of margarita’s I thought I was on fire. I thought they were laughing with me, not at me.

The hot blonde needed another drink so I offered to get it for her. On my way to the bar a female patron tapped me on the shoulder and said,

“You’ve got something going on in your pants.”

“Excuse me?”

“I said, you have something going on in your pants.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“Why don’t you look at your pants, that’s where it’s going on.”

I looked down to see my freshly pressed dress shirt hanging out the zipper of my khakis like a pale blue cotton wiener. If only I’d listened to my mother when she said to always wash my hands after taking a piss, I probably would have noticed what was going on in my pants before the rest of the bar had.