My Top Ten Most Embarrassing Moments
- After locking my beach cruiser up at school, turn to walk away, snap front shirt snags on handle bars and opens completely up, 1986
- Bird poops in my (meticulously styled) pseudo-claw bangs during lunch at new school, 1988
- Bathing suit falls completely off my body as I dive into crowded community pool, 1990
- First experience with tequila, start to throw up before I am all the way out of a kitchen during a Disco House Party, 1996
- Eat the black spray paint off my butterfly antennae in Chico on Halloween, 1997
- Work, sitting at my desk, absent minded, open bubbly water, water over flows onto the crotch of my pale colored khakis, looks like I pee’d myself in the middle of work, 2004
- Splitting my pants open (from bottom of zipper to belt loops in back) on the dance floor in a Vegas club, 2004
- Homeless lady gets pissed off when I don’t have change and asks me if I’m pregnant, 2004
- While recovering from a brutal New Years Eve hangover a 5 year old states that I have a mustache, 2005
- Accidentally email a sex joke about senior citizens to a client, 2005
Ooooooh, I am so jealous, you posted your embarrassments list before I did. I have been writing dowm my most embarrassing moments, but the list became, um, embarrassingly LONG, so I was trying to break it into manageable chunks. Hah hah. what a dork am I.
If it makes you feel any better, I will post my list this week. Then you will see you are not alone, especially on # 10.
One night my dog ran away and I was chasing her and I almost caught up to her. I bent down to pick up her leash and my pants totally ripped in the back, from bottom to top of my ass. And I don’t wear underwear. And there was a car coming down the alley, its headlights shining on my newly exposed, white ass.